My Parents

I have amazing parents. My dad gets up every morning and goes to work. He’s given up his whole life to provide enough for us, on one income, so that Mommy could stay home and homeschool us. My Mom reminds me of the Proverbs 31 woman (and if there was a Proverbs 31 man, I’m sure my dad would be one, also:)). She has stayed home every day with us since I was born, so that she could “train us in the way we should go.” I’ve continuously seen her give up what she wants so that we can learn. She’ll be putting in a load of laundry when my sister who has dyslexia and hearing-processing disorder, calls from the other room that she just got a D on an assignment because she didn’t understand it. She’ll put the laundry on hold, go into the livingroom, and get hands-on tools (like magazines for advertisements, blocks for multiplication, cardboard “pies” for fractions, etc), and spend the next half hour teaching her. She’ll sit next to my siblings for hours on end to make sure they understand what they’re doing. Then, when she can grab a minute, she’ll run go put in the 4th load of laundry for the day, work on her home-based business to bring in a couple of extra dollars a week, or clean up another mess in the kitchen. They start their days before the sun comes up, and end their days after the sun goes down.

I will always be grateful to my parents for giving up their lives for us. For living on one income, giving up vacations, living in a messy house, always having kids around, and living simply.

My mom and dad do everything they can to make sure they’re doing whatever they can for us. If you stop by, our house will probably be messy, there’ll probably be kids running all over the place, and there may be a lot of noise, but you’ll find a generally happy home. If you lined up all of the moms and dads in the whole world, I would always choose the mom and dad I have. You may think you have the best parents ever, but it’s not possible, because I already have them. 🙂

 

Humility

How do you accept and appreciate the fact that you’re good at things, without becoming prideful? Proverbs 16:18 says, “Pride goeth before a fall, and a haughty spirit before destruction.” Proverbs 11:2 says, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.” Proverbs 16:5 says, “The LORD detests all the proud of heart. Be sure of this: They will not go unpunished.” Proverbs 8:13 says, “Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.”
The Bible goes on and on and on. I’ve struggled with this concept for a while. Does that mean that I convince myself I’m not good at anything; that it’s all in how people see me and my talents? I’m supposed to see myself as God’s creation and since He created me in His image and He’s prefect, does it mean pride isn’t as big of a sin as it’s made out to be?

After expressing my confusion to my incredibly wise Mom, she said I’m supposed to accept that I’m good at things and that I have talents, but only because God gave them to me. If God hadn’t blessed me with these gifts, I would have nothing and I would be nothing. He gave them to me so I can use them to bring Him glory. So basically, I should have pride in God and humility in myself. I hope this shines even a fraction of light on this subject for you, as it did for me.

I’m so thankful for the parents with whom God saw fit to bless me. They have made it their number one goal to make sure all of their kids grew up knowing their Creator and having a personal relationship with Him, and they continue to work to that end.

The Future

God’s timing is always perfect. He has proven that to me over and over again. However, His timing doesn’t always match my timing. If I had my way, I probably would have moved to Haiti 3-4 years ago. But then I wouldn’t have been around for Mom’s cancer-fighting journey, for our move to this amazing new house, to be a part of my siblings’ lives, and I wouldn’t have met my awesome friends in my small group. I miss all of my friends and adopted family in Haiti, but I’m so thankful God has kept me here these last several years. I was talking to a friend at church yesterday, and she reminded me that looking at the positive side of things really makes it easier. You can’t see what God has planned for 5 years from now, or even tomorrow, but you can control your attitude.

For years, many people asked me if I’d ever considered being a nurse. I always answered that I didn’t think I was cut out for it. I just wasn’t the nursing type. However, when I went to Haiti 3 years ago, a pastor on the trip was working in wound care and asked if I would help him treat a sore on a baby’s arm. Those of you who know me, know I can’t resist a baby. So I said yes, and worked wound care for the rest of the week. When I realized I could stand wound care and I thought about how many people had suggested I go to nursing school, I felt like God was saying to go for it. I conceded and told God (no, I don’t think I really thought through “telling God” anything) I would pursue an LPN degree. When I got together with a nursing advisor at a local college, she said I could have all of my pre-requisites and co-requisites for the RN program done in the same time as I could for the LPN program. In addition, the RN program is only one semester longer. So I said ok, I would apply for both and accept whichever position I got. You might have guessed….I got into the RN program. I feel confident that I’m where God wants me for now. Except for the tests, I’m actually enjoying school. I’m enjoying learning new skills and gaining knowledge I’ll appreciate and be able to use for the rest of my life.

I don’t know, yet, what I’m going to do after I finish nursing school. I’m considering several options. I’d really like to move to Haiti, but I’m also considering pursuing a Masters or even Doctorate in midwifery or nurse practitioner. If I move to Haiti or get married and start having kids, there’s not a good chance I’ll go back to school, so I want to make sure I accomplish any schooling I may want/need while I’m still in the States and haven’t started a family. So we’ll see what happens! I guess the one thing I’ve learned for certain, is to stay in touch with God on a daily basis.

 

 

 

Insecurities

God has recently revealed to me that I’m a very insecure person. I mean, I’ve always known that I’m insecure. But He is opening my eyes to the fact that my insecurities are getting in the way of my relationships. Especially, more recently, my relationships with my family. I worry about what other people think of me. So to make myself feel better, I put myself before others.

Genesis 29-30 tells the story of how Jacob worked for 7 years to marry Rachel, the younger daughter of Laban, only to find out he had actually married, Leah, the older daughter. Laban promised that if Jacob honored the “bridal week” of his daughter Leah, he would then give Rachel to Jacob in exchange for another 7 years’ work. On top of being jealous and angry, I would imagine Leah felt quite insecure in Jacob’s love. In fact, the Bible says that she named her first son Reuben, because “surely my husband will love me now.” After her third son was born, she said “now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” And it continued because after bearing her sixth son, she was still saying “this time my husband will treat me with honor, because I have borne him six sons.” Like Leah, sometimes I think “If I say this, surely they’ll think I’m smart,” when in reality, I’m probably just making the other person feel badly about themselves and driving a wedge between us. Is it worth it? All that should matter is what God thinks of me. And if I’m tearing others down in order to build myself up, I can’t imagine God is very proud of me.

My whole family is extremely competitive. We can make just about anything into a competition. And we do. Including “who can get their homework done first?” Or “whose room looks best?” Or even something like “who can stand in the snow barefoot the longest?” Sometimes we forget to make sure the spirit of the competition stays positive. Often it ends with someone getting hurt. When we compete, usually it’s just for fun, but other times we’re doing it to build ourselves up. We’re not thinking about what’s best for everyone else, but what will make us feel better about ourselves.

Ephesians 4:1-32 says, “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” My goal in life should be to live with humility and gentleness and to strive to make others feel better about themselves. I was created IN HIS IMAGE. YOU were created in His image. We can’t get much better than that. That should be all the assurance of my worth that I need.

 

 

 

 

Bedtimes

Why do kids dislike bedtime so much? Just about every night is a battle at our house. My siblings come back downstairs several times after being put to bed. I remember, when I was probably 7 and Sarah was around 5, Nathan and Rachel were both young enough to still need naps so Mom would make all of us go upstairs for a couple of hours and lay down (I’m sure she was desperately hoping we’d go to sleep). One day Sarah and I decided we weren’t tired and that our room needed a makeover….Mom came upstairs a little while later to find out what all the noise was and found we had rearranged our whole room, including our beds and dressers. She was NOT very happy. 🙂

Sarah and I hated nap time so much that it got to the point that after we felt we’d been lying down for at least an hour (when in reality it was probably 15 or 20 minutes), we’d go to the top of the stairs and yell to Mom, “Mommy?!? Can we come down now? We promise that if we whine or cry even one time, you can send us straight to bed!” Looking back, I can’t believe it worked most days. 🙂

As my siblings got ready for bed tonight, I was just struck with how much things change as you get older. When you’re younger, you look for any excuse, no matter how far-fetched – like “I can’t sleep because I smell popcorn,” or “I forgot to ask; are we going anywhere in the morning?” to avoid going to bed. But when you’re in college, you set your alarm 30 minutes early just so you can hit snooze 5 or 6 times. Or you try to escape for an hour to go take a nap. No big, deep post tonight. Just reminiscing and thought you’d like to go back with me. 🙂

 

Endings and Beginnings

Mylee with GardeniaChase this past fall

For the past 2 years, we’ve gotten to take care of 2 amazing kids. Mylee Grace is 5 years old and Chase will be 2 next month. I remember when Chase’s mom dropped him off at our house the first time so she could go to work. He was 2 weeks old and when his mom walked out, I unbuckled this tiny baby’s car seat and picked him up. I was stunned that something so tiny and light (between 6-7 lbs), could blink his eyes. It was absolutely amazing.

Now this baby is full of personality. He’s incredibly independent. He imitates everything. And he’s starting to speak in sentences. Mylee is adopting one of our kittens, as her first pet. She named it Gardenia. 🙂  She’s also very independent. She LOVES princesses. And she loves to dress up.

We’re sad because Mylee and Chase are moving to Michigan at the end of the week. But we trust that God has someone else picked out to be in their lives now. And we trust that God has a plan to put someone else in our lives who needs our help. We can’t wait to meet these new friends! So please keep Mylee and Chase in your prayers as they begin a new adventure, and remember to pray for us, that we’ll recognize our new friends when He brings them into our lives. 

Mylee this past summer  Chase

Chase and me 🙂

Tuesdays

For most people, Mondays are the day they dread. Things typically don’t go right, you don’t get the things accomplished you planned to complete, things break, you get bad news, it’s just not a good day. For our family, that day is Tuesday. We know to expect the unexpected, plan to not accomplish much, and remember that attitudes are going to be difficult.

Today, we found out that all the pipes in our only bathroom with a working shower are frozen. That means we have one toilet for 9 people. The only sink we can use is in the kitchen, so that’s where everyone is brushing their teeth. And worst of all, that means there are about 5 of us who REALLY need showers which can’t take place.

Dad got ready to leave for work this morning (having washed his hair in the kitchen sink) and found out his keys had been locked in his truck last night…..so he had to take our mini van to work at Trugreen this morning.

And we got a phone call, already this morning, giving us possible bad news (that I’m not at liberty to share this morning.)

What a start to the morning! I have to remember that I’m supposed to get up each morning and give the day to God. I have to remember that what happens today, is what He wants to happen. We may not get anything done except for playing with 2 very special kids who are moving away at the end of the week, but that’s what’s supposed to happen. And I have to remember to keep a good attitude. Being grouchy and short isn’t going to make it any better. So here goes my attempt to make it a good day, despite the difficult start. 🙂

Love the Sinner, Hate the Sin

“Love the sinner, hate the sin.” What a difficult concept. As a conservative, I disagree with many of President Barack Obama’s decisions. I believe that life begins at conception and that abortion is Biblically and morally wrong. I believe that Americans have the right to bear arms and that it’s not guns that kill people, but the angry people holding guns. I disagree with instituting laws that take guns from American people. I disagree with universal healthcare. I believe it is the church’s responsibility to care for the poor, sick, widows, and orphans….it’s not the government’s right to take my hard-earned money and use it to pay for things with which I don’t agree. I disagree with taking God out of schools. I believe everyone has a right to worship whomever they want, but that doesn’t mean you forbid one religion to make room for another religion. I “hate” the decisions President Obama is making for our country, but I don’t “hate” him. We’re trying to teach my 8-year old brother that we need to pray for the President. We need to pray for him to come to know Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior (if he hasn’t already) and will begin a personal walk with Him. We need to pray that he looks to God for wisdom as he makes decisions that will change the course of history forever. Please join me in praying for all of the leaders of our country, states, cities, and schools. Pray that our country will remain “A shining beacon on a hill” and a light and refuge to people all over the world.

As I watch the inauguration of President Obama this morning, I’m reminded of an incredible tv series that I watched. It’s called “The West Wing” and it aired when I was younger, but it’s on dvd and Netflix now. If you want to see how the White House and running a country work, I highly recommend it.

I hope I haven’t made anyone angry or offended anyone. That was not my intention – I want to enlist all of your help in praying for our amazing country.

 

Changed Dreams

I can still remember…..it had to have been at least 13 years ago……I couldn’t have been older than 8 or so, maybe even younger. My dad was the senior pastor of a small church – 150 members on a good day. It was a Wednesday night and usually I chose to go to “class” with my friends, but for some reason, I decided to go to “Wednesday night church” with my mom instead. My dad announced that he was going to allow a time for spontaneous prayer. If you wanted to pray, you could stand up and pray; if you didn’t want to, there was no pressure. When my dad said this, I started to get this lump in my stomach. As a couple of people prayed, it got bigger and bigger and I felt more and more sick to my stomach. I whispered to Mom that I felt like God was asking me to pray, but I didn’t want to. Mom told me that if I felt like God was asking me to do something, I should listen to Him. I started crying and kept waiting, and finally, I stood up and said, “Dear, Jesus, Thank you for loving us,” and sat back down. It was terrifying, and I have a feeling I avoided going to service with Mom after that. 🙂 But I obeyed.

Ever since I was tiny, I’ve found the thought of God speaking to me scary for several reasons. I was afraid He would tell me to do something I didn’t want to do. I was scared to listen, because I was afraid I wouldn’t hear. But most of all, I was afraid I wouldn’t understand what He was trying to say to me. I spent time crying to Mom because I wanted to know what God wanted for me, but I didn’t know how to listen. As I’ve gotten older, I’m still afraid to listen sometimes, but it gets easier. I look back over my experiences and find that God’s voice isn’t physically audible (another one of my fears.) He speaks through Bible verses, other people, a feeling in your stomach and heart, and even a changed dream!

When I was younger, all I wanted to be was a stay-at-home mom and homeschool my kids. Mom and Dad ask us sometimes “How are you going to be a missionary to people around you?” And I answered that I wanted to raise my kids and teach them about Jesus’ love and be a missionary in my own backyard, to my neighbors. As I’ve told some of you before, my dream changed suddenly. After we adopted my brother, Elson, from Haiti, I knew I wanted to visit Haiti (never having wanted to leave the country before.) I got the opportunity to go, fell in love with the country and people, and that’s where I want to live long-term after I finish school. How amazing is our God?!? I’m so grateful that He speaks in so many ways and that He’s big enough to overcome my fears and plans and create His dream in me. So don’t be afraid to listen, dream, and ask for God’s will for your life.

Coming soon: How He changed another dream and delayed my move to Haiti, assuring me I should go to nursing school first. 🙂

Fruit Worthy

I’ve chosen to base my blog on Colossians 1:9-14. It says,

“9 And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, 10 so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. 11 May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, 12 giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. 13 He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, 14 in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”

Like it exhorts us in 1 Corinthians 10:31, it is my goal in life to bring glory to God in all I do, even when it’s something as “every-day” as eating and drinking. As I have my devotions and spend time with Him every day and get to know Him better, I learn what he wants me to do, both in the menial tasks like whether I should go to the store or stay home, and in the “more important” decisions like whether I should move to Haiti or go to nursing school. It’s also my goal to give God room to develop the Fruit of the Spirit in me. In order for Him to be able to develop fruit in me, I have to repent from my sins so there isn’t a barrier between us and so He can work on me and in me. It’s my goal to be Fruit Worthy – having repented of my sins and ready for the Holy Spirit to lead me out of the darkness, teach me the knowledge of God, and help me live fully pleasing to Him.